Wednesday, October 15, 2025

Fall Catch-Up (or Why I Haven't Updated in Forever...)

 


It's been a while since I last posted (toward the end of September, I believe). I could turn this into a basic "excuse," but honestly, I've got a story to tell. So sit back, pour yourself a hot beverage (or cold, if you're like me), and read on.

I have been in a burnout funk since my birthday. My birthday was way back in the early days of September. I was hoping to have some tarot reading clients booked that day to keep me busy, after my solar return reading with my astrologer Jane. But no one booked. So instead, I ordered Pizza Hut and did absolutely nothing all day. I sat in my favorite chair, binged watched TV, listened to music, annnnnd did nothing!

Since that day, I've had problems motivating myself to create content for Instagram and write blogs. I no longer have my "get up and go-go-go" attitude that I've had with me pretty much all summer. I feel like my spirit guides were telling me to slow down. Especially since I had a few events lined up in late September and October.

Towards the end of September, I was getting my spunk back. But then, my dad fell in the shower. He was in the hospital for testing, but we never received those results because he was cussing up a storm at the nurses and doctors at the hospital (and I am so sorry for those nurses and doctors that had to deal with my dad and people like him). Before all this happened, he was seeing a neurologist for fluid on his brain. They did an electroencephalograph on him, and we don't even have those results because the neurologist made him go to the hospital because he had fallen the day before the appointment. 

So now, on top of trying to get my energy back, I have been worried about my dad. He's doing better now, and I think I can start resuming content creating again for both Instagrams and hopefully my blogs. 

But let me tell you. My dad is a stubborn, Agent Orange-sprayed, Vietnam veteran. It is so hard to get him to get his results. He says he is fine, and we must believe him. My mom doesn't want to push the subject. So, I am trying not just to get my energy back, but also to stop worrying.

My dad fell again earlier this past week. But luckily he didn't hit his head like he did last time. He fell on his butt trying to take his socks off. Luckily, I was up when I heard him fall. I had to get my mom, because my dad doesn't want me to help him, and wake her up. And luckily for my dad, he didn't break any bones.

So it's been...chaotic? I hope to catch up on some blogging. I had a whole content planner of blog posts planned. But I just haven't been able to write anything but poems. I wrote a lot of sad poems about my dad, which will be published when the time comes. I had trouble dealing with what was going on with my dad. My mom didn't want to tell me much about my dad, and that sucked even more. But my mom mainly didn't tell me much because she cannot be my rock I need right now. And she knows I will take all of this hard. I mean...hello? Is there any other way to take it? We were also trying to find out if he had the early stages of dementia as he shuffles when he walks and his short-term memory is bad.

So that's what's been going on with me. I hope to have a new blog post written by next week! I'm not even sure what it will be about. It will probably be a poetry dump. Although my poems are going to be more redundant, I think, and a lot of it will be poems that are available in my books, than what I have been working on.

I hope to resume posting to Instagram on both accounts this week!

Thank you for your patience, love, and understanding. 💖🙏



Wednesday, September 24, 2025

3 Things I Loved (and 1 Thing I Hated) in September 2025

 


Welcome, ladies and germs to another edition of 3 Things I Loved (and 1 Thing I Absolutely Hated), September 2025 edition!

September was a quiet month for me for the most part, even with these eclipses. Nothing major happened to me. I wasn't really creative much this month. I think I only wrote four or five poems this month, and only got as far as chapter five on my novella I am writing. As you know, I had to start my novella from scratch because my laptop crashed last month. I'm writing a whole new concept.

Anyway, without further a due, here are three things I loved in September!

1. Sabrina Carpenter's new album "Man's Best Friend"
Sabrina Carpenter's new album is a banger to me. I fell in love with three songs on the album.  They are: "Sugar Talking", "We Almost Broke Up Again Last Night", and "Never Getting Laid". Each of these songs reminds me of my recent relationship with my now ex. Especially Sugar Talking and We Almost Broke Up Again Last Night. Never Getting Laid is pretty much my anthem right now because I haven't had sex in five years and I am not breaking that record for just anyone. They gotta be pretty freaking special. Also, I kinda wish my recent ex to go as long as me without sex. I know, I'm an evil bitch.

2. TeenNick's new nighttime schedule
Okay, I am loving the nighttime schedule on the cable channel, TeenNick. Fairly OddParents, Rugrats, and Hey Arnold all night long! I love it! Very relaxing and calming shows. No freaking SpongeBob or Ren & Stimpy screaming at the top of their lungs waking me up and scaring me. Although, I recently watched Ren & Stimpy on Paramount Plus and fell asleep to it. Although, to be fair, it was season one (the only season I tolerate).  But yeah, I'm enjoying the new nighttime line up and don't have to turn on a streaming service at night anymore when I can watch old school Rugrats (pre-Dill and Kimi) and some Hey Arnold. Did you know my favorite Hey Arnold character is Helga Pataki and my favorite Rugrat is Angelica Pickles? That tells ya'all something ;-)

3. Sharpening my listening skills with this insightful book "Counselling Skills For Dummies" by Gail Evans
I am trying to improve my listening skills as a tarot reader and as a family member and friend. This book was recommended in a few of my tarot books I've read, most recently a book by Theresa Reed aka The Tarot Lady, "The Cards You're Dealt With". The Cards You're Dealt With and Counselling Skills For Dummies are two must-read books for people who wish to go pro reading tarot cards for others (as you know, I read tarot cards for my day job). Counselling Skills For Dummies has exercises for you to reflect on such as how well you take care of yourself in all aspects of your life such as emotionally, physically, career, friends & family, spiritually. I learned that I take care of myself better than I thought I did. I also learned where I needed to focus more on (hello, relaxing and finding peace!). I also did a drawing of all the things that support me and things that drag me down. Again, I was amazed by all the things that lift me up and support me and what little stuff weighs me down. I am only on chapter five of this book, I'm slowly taking in everything I read to comprehend it better. But this book will be a permanent fixture in my library and I will constantly recommend this book to my tarot reading colleagues.

And now, it is time for the one thing I absolutely hated in September 2025!

Drum roll please...


NOTHING!!!

I honestly can't think of anything that really bugged me this month. It's a shocker. Honestly, I felt great up until this week. I'm starting to burn out on creating content for my Tarot & Poetry Instagrams, writing blogs every week, and writing my novella. And on top of that, I am filming reels everyday for my tarot Instagram that I haven't created reels for my poetry instagram in such a long time. And I've been meaning to!

September for the most part was just quiet and productive.

So yup, that's the recap for this month. I would rate September 4.5 stars out of 5 stars. ⭐⭐⭐⭐✨

I'll see you all next month!






Wednesday, September 17, 2025

September Poem Dump

 


Leftist Punching Bag
By: Samantha Jean Tate

I once voted for a villain

to make someone else happy.

This someone convinced me 

People misunderstood the villain.

The person I made happy?

He still bitched.

He still complained.

He still felt lonely and misunderstood.

He still had an icy heart

and didn't give a flying fuck about my grand gesture.

He said he wanted me to stay liberal.

He enjoyed challenging my point of view.

But I don't argue when we clearly do not see

eye to eye.

I was just his leftist punching bag.

And somehow, 

He still had my heart.


Buggin' By: Samantha Jean Tate


Oh man, I'm totally buggin'.

I failed my driver's test again.

This time I didn't quit.

I just drove until I almost got hit.

I'm totally buggin'

How else am I supposed to go to the concert?

I guess I'll have to sell the tickets,

Cancel my hot date.

Buggin' was not in my fate.



Chasing Sparks By: Samantha Jean Tate


I no longer chase sparks,

I chase connection.

I chase authenticity.

I'm looking for realness.

I'm seeking that wildfire,

Someone who knows how to start my fire,

And put it out.

I'm looking for magic

in a mundane world.

I'm looking for starlit dinners,

And serenades under the moonlight.

Slow dancing in the kitchen

Making pancakes at 3 AM

Lying in lavender fields

Talking about life.

I'm no longer chasing sparks.

I'm chasing a flaming passion.



Samantha, Unboxed By: Samantha Jean Tate


I spent forty years

Trying to fit myself

Into neat, tiny, little boxes

For society's sake.


I wasn't just Samantha.

I was—

Samantha, the career woman.

Samantha, the autistic woman.

Samantha, the single woman.

Samantha, the beautiful woman.

Samantha, the mediocre woman.


I was a 

Fat woman.

A get healthy woman.

That McDonald's chick.

That spinach-loving freak.


I wore these costumes

Stitched too tight.


I was the aunt.

The baby sister.

The daughter.

The granddaughter.

The niece.

The cousin.

The friend.

The enemy.

The lover.


Every role handed to me,

like womanhood was a checklist.

As if my worth was only real,

When it had a name to it.


But underneath these skin-tight costumes,

there's just me—

a woman who will return to stardust one day.

And be nothing.

But time and space.



Her Magic Still Lingers By: Samantha Jean Tate


Her magic still lingers

In his heart.

Her spells still linger

In his chest

Like butterflies.

Her whimsy still fascinates

Him and perplexes

Him.

Her laughter rings through

His ears.

He's still in love with her.

Her sorcery and all.


My Friend Hope
By: Samantha Jean Tate

I ran into my old friend Hope.

She was still the same.

Long, sunshine hair

Wearing a flowy dress

Like Florence Welch.

She was still the

Rose-colored glasses

Starry-eyed optimist.

"How do you keep going?" I asked her.

She pulled me close -

Her floral perfume lingered, lilac scent filled the air.


"People think I'm all rose-colored glasses and glittery dreams", she smirked, like she knew a secret.

"But the truth is," she leaned in and her voice grew softer,

"I break down too. I get tired. I'll stare out the window sometimes and feel...nothing."

She glanced at the ground, twisting a ring on her finger.

"It's not all bad. Cynicism keeps me grounded. Realism reminds me I'm alive."


I ran into my old friend Hope.

She enlightens me and encourages me to keep going.

Even when the world isn't listening,

When I am numb to my environment—

Like when the world is moving fast and I'm stuck on pause,

Or I want to end it all.

Hope is not a person.

She is

Me.


It Feels Good By: Samantha Jean Tate


It feels good

Not to have you in my life anymore

Finally, I am free to be me

Be the person I actually am

Don't have to hide or put up a facade


It feels good

To miss you

But no longer want you

It feels good that you've moved on

I've moved on too

I've chosen myself


It feels good

To no longer have to deal with sarcasm and attitudes

And disingenuous applause

It feels good

That I've finally chosen me!


Time to Move on

By: Samantha Jean Tate


"It's time to move on," she said as she woke up and rose out of bed.

"I'm done grieving, I'm tired of feeling hurt, I'm tired of letting betrayal take power away from me," she said as she looked in the mirror, washing her face, getting the sleepy bugs out of her eyes.

"It's time for me to live. It's time to get out of survival and time to live in thrive-al."

She brushed her teeth, washed up, and put on her clothes.  She was ready to embrace the day with courage. She had enough of crying and feeling lonely. She did enough grieving. She did enough sobbing. She did enough feeling sorry for herself.


Here she was, ready to face whatever the day brought to her.

She set her intention to find joy in life without him.

She was ready.

It was time to move on.

And she encourages you to move on, too.

Because she is me.


Which poem resonated with you the most? What was your favorite line? Drop me a comment and let me know! I'd love some feedback!

Monday, September 15, 2025

Upcoming Book Signing @ R&B Used Books in Grand Blanc, Michigan

 


I will be at R&B Used Books in Grand Blanc, Michigan on Saturday, September 27, 2025 from 12pm to 2pm having a book signing for my poetry books, GROWTH: A Healing Journey of Poetry and Prose; and See Ya & Other Goodbyes: Poems & Prose About Life, Love, and Loss Through My Eyes.

GROWTH: A Healing Journey of Poetry and Prose invites readers into an intimate and raw exploration of self-healing. Through powerful poetry and prose, Samantha Jean Tate shares her deeply personal journey, navigating topics such as mental illness, suicide, death, rape, verbal abuse, and struggles with self-worth. Spanning the years from 2021 to 2024, this collection reflects on moments of intense emotion and resilience, offering insight and catharsis to those who have walked similar paths.


Diagnosed with autism at 22 and bipolar disorder in recent years, Samantha Jean Tate provides an unflinching portrayal of life’s battles, from bullying and low self-esteem to mental health struggles and suicide attempts. Written with vulnerability, GROWTH is a testament to the power of creativity and self-expression as tools for healing.


See Ya & Other Goodbyes: Poems & Prose About Life, Love, and Loss Through My Eyes is a heartfelt collection that captures the many shades of goodbye. Through tender poems and reflective prose, Samantha Jean Tate explores romantic breakups, the enduring grief of losing beloved grandmothers, the sorrow of pet loss, and the bittersweet endings of friendships. Alongside these goodbyes are meditations on the simple pleasures of life, the search for kindred spirits, the journey of growing older, and the quiet triumph of learning to feel at home in one’s own skin. Honest, raw, and deeply personal, See Ya & Other Goodbyes is a tribute to love, loss, aging, and the quiet, resilient beauty of being human.


Both books will be available for purchase. A complimentary inscription and signing come with your book. You may also bring in your already purchased copy and I will be happy to sign it for you 😊


Let's make this book signing a success not only for me, but for a local small business!


R&B Used Books is located at:

12830 S. Saginaw Street Suite #F

Grand Blanc, MI 48439 United States of America